by Tom Rocco
The beach is a place where a man can feel he’s the only soul in the world that’s real- The Who, “Bell Boy” from Quadrophenia
I’m not exactly sure what that means, but I love The Who and this piece is about the beach, so there you go! More specifically it’s about the fifth MenLiving intention, “Live Intentionally.” Like many of us, my life is a series of tasks (cleaning, exercising, calling to check on my 97 year-old mom, etc.), interspersed with times of great fun. Sure, I often make conscious, intentional decisions on the day’s activities, but often I just move on to the next thing. This isn’t all bad, I have a daily path that I’m very happy with, but it often feels less than fully intentional. Being at the beach is different. When I go to the beach, like we did four times in six days on our July Cape Cod vacation, averaging five hours a visit, it’s my time to flex my “Live Intentionally” muscle. For me, there are pretty much five main “beach things” I enjoy: (1) Eating (2) Reading (3) Going in the water (sometimes even swimming) (4) Walking with my wife (5) Chilling, this could be staring at the water, people watching, napping, etc.) (6) Some kind of activity, playing beach paddle ball, great to get you heated up for #3, frisbee, and like this last time, having a catch with my son (a favorite, the final scene in “Field of Dreams” leaves me in a puddle of tears every time, but I digress!) I don’t count chatting, since that’s always present. When we first sit down, I get to choose, with no pressure, what I’d like to do. Having a good chunk of time with finite options is key. Sure, I have some patterns, if it’s super hot, maybe check out the water, if it’s a bit late (we are not early morning beach people) maybe jump right into lunch, a little reading is always a nice place to start, but it is a fully intentional choice. It gets more interesting after a couple of hours when the obvious has been addressed, I sit with my choices and am fully intentional like I’m not at any other time. I strive to be like this more at home, every time. Sometimes it even works. I’ll intentionally decide it’s a great time for lunch, but then one moment later, “Hi Mom, how are you feeling today?”
