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BlogLiving Intentionally
In the Zone
By Jason Samatas Growing up in Chicago in the 80’s and 90’s, it was really hard to escape Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls. As the team got better around him and they started winning consecutive championships starting in 1991,…
May 13, 2025
BlogLiving Candidly
I’m an Emotional Man, but am I Emotionally Available?
By Jim Herbert As I sit here today, I am an openly and unabashedly emotional man. While I have always been emotional, even since my early childhood, it wasn’t until I was in my 40s that I became more comfortable…
May 6, 2025
BlogLiving Consciously
Having a Blast: A Road Trip Story
By Chris Willett Hitting the road, having a damn good time, learning about myself, others, and this wild mystery called life. I love traveling—really love it. Doesn’t matter if I’m walking, flying, sailing, riding the rails, or in the back…
May 6, 2025
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Consciously
Us and Them
by Todd Adams I will be leading a MenLiving Weekend Advance in September focused around the music of Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon. One song I'm really looking forward to discussing is "Us and Them" because it speaks…
April 29, 2025
BlogElders
Hitting Life Softer
by Jim Herbert I have had numerous moments in my life when I have been provided the opportunity to recognize a younger version of myself in another person's actions or behaviors. Sometimes I recognize things that I like about my…
April 29, 2025
BlogLiving ConsciouslyLiving Healthy
SOMETIMES IT’S TIME!
by Chris Willett Sometimes it’s time. Sometimes it’s time Sometimes it’s time it’s time to go take a look, look off the cliff, look into the abyss see what there is to be seen sometimes it’s time. Let’s go, let’s…
April 29, 2025
BlogLiving ConsciouslyLiving Intentionally
The Granny Shot
Growing up in Bostonland in the 1970s, I was a rabid Celtics fan (still am—though a little less since Larry retired!). Lately, I’ve been watching Celtic City, the Max documentary on the history of the franchise. The early episodes spend…
April 23, 2025
BlogLiving Connected
The Importance of “Continuing Bonds” To This Dad
by Mark Miller It’s a milestone day for me. After a six-year journey in developing a smartphone app as a side hustle from my day jobas a passive house architect, I am thrilled to share my Love Notes app is…
April 22, 2025
BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Connected
Enlightened Masculinity’s Role in Fatherhood?
by Yitz Miller Enlightened Masculinity’s role in Fatherhood? Something shifted a year ago. After nearly 20 years of “men’s work” shepherded me through divorce, a career change and the dissolution of it, personal and financial tragedy, relocation to Boston, 3…
April 15, 2025BlogLiving Curiously
How to Have a Meaningful Conversation
by Chris Willett Lately, I’ve been thinking about what makes a conversation truly meaningful. Then I stumbled across a TED Talk called “10 Ways to Have a Better Conversation” by Celeste Headlee, and it pretty much summed up everything I’ve…
April 15, 2025
BlogLiving EmotionallyLiving Intentionally
An Invitation to Be an Enlightened Hero
by Harry Hitzeman I have long thought of myself as a hero. After the sudden death of my father when I was 11 years old, my uncle told me I am now the Man of the House. Throughout the rest…
April 8, 2025
BlogLiving Emotionally
Gender Roles
by Dean Wixo I’ve been wanting to get involved with Men Living for some time now and have been receiving the newsletters for a couple of years. While I haven’t necessarily earned the “stripes” to offer my thoughts or opinions…
March 31, 2025
BlogLiving Connected
Going With The Flow
by Martin Mcleish This is definitely not about getting validation, or being validated. Please understand that. Today I did something completely out of character for me. I pulled into the shopping centre and I saw this homeless woman sitting with…
March 31, 2025BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Connected
March Unmadness
by Donald Bialkowski I wanted to share something from my "march unmadness" series — simple strategies to bring more ease, connection, and clarity into your life and relationships. because when it comes to meaningful change, it's often the small shifts…
March 24, 2025
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Emotionally
Carry the Best of Me
by Mike Rosen Writing this blog is fun, and challenging too. How can I economize words? How can I fully communicate, share, and convey something reasonably relevant and mildly interesting to the MenLiving audience in as few words as possible?…
March 17, 2025
BlogLiving Intentionally
It’s Safe Up There
by Jason Samatas I’ve been an airline pilot for almost four years. Not a day goes by where I don’t take a moment to recognize what an incredible system the aviation community is built around. In airplanes, airports, FAA procedures,…
March 11, 2025
BlogLiving Candidly
Slow Down, Slow the Fuck Down
by Chris Willett I'm getting out the soapbox so I can do a little preaching… So often, I want to yell at somebody, "Slow down!" And I'm not talking about getting cut off in traffic; I'm talking about slowing the…
March 7, 2025
BlogLiving Intentionally
The Man Who Seeks Himself: A Journey to Self-Awareness
by Dan Silberberg You are here. You were given a name, a role, a set of expectations. You were handed a map before you even knew how to walk—before you had a chance to draw one of your own. And…
March 7, 2025
BlogLiving Emotionally
My First Lesson in Fatherhood
by Jim Herbert Fatherhood has taught me many lessons in life, none of them bigger than the one I learned on my very first day of being a dad. I spent the first 53 years of my life celebrating my…
March 4, 2025
BlogLiving Emotionally
On Fatherhood and Dadhood
by Yitz Miller I am touched and honored by the invitation to shepherd MenLiving’s Fatherhood initiative, to co-facilitate the first month of meetings (Thursdays, noon Central Time starting March 6) with ML Executive Directorion Todd Adams and ML Facilitation Lead…
February 24, 2025
BlogLiving Candidly
15 Random Things You Might Not Know About MenLiving
by Todd Adams MenLiving is all about connection, real conversations, and a community where you can show up exactly as you are. But even if you've been around for a while, there are probably a few things you didn’t know…
February 18, 2025
BlogLiving Intentionally
Conflict is a Good Thing
by Donald Bialkowski This week, I wanted to discuss a common human experience: conflict. TAKEAWAY: Conflict is like fertilizer for relationships - it helps them grow. Now, that being said, the level of intensity matters. Let's consider the story of…
February 10, 2025
BlogLiving Candidly
What a Man Needs to Know About Menopause to Save His Love and Sex Life
by Shana James Menopause is a profound transformation in a woman’s life, affecting not only her body, but her emotions, energy, and entire sense of self. I know this affects you too. For men in long-term relationships, it's undoubtedly hard,…
February 7, 2025
BlogLiving Candidly
What am I so Afraid of?
by Mike Rosen This past week I was lucky enough to attend the Zen Parenting Conference in suburban Chicago. For those not familiar, one of the co-founders of MenLiving, Todd Adams, and his wife Cathy host a podcast called Zen…
February 3, 2025
BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Connected
Lighten Up, Man!
By Jason Samatas As I reflect on my past blog posts written for MenLiving, I’m aware of how serious and dark many of them are. My only defense to this accurate charge is that the world, at times, feels serious…
January 28, 2025
BlogEldersLiving Intentionally
How Are You Aging Gayfully?
by Christopher MacLellan Just the other day, I asked a lifelong friend of mine…”So Jim, how are you AgingGayfully™?” Puzzled, he looked at me in amazement and said…”What do you mean, I’m not gay!” “Goodness,” I replied, “I didn’t ask…
January 24, 2025
BlogLiving IntentionallyUncategorized
Building the Perfect Fire
by Jim Herbert I’m freshly returned from the MenLiving Midwest Advance and I am feeling all the feels. To say that the experience was profound would be an understatement of epic proportions. I had the honor of serving on the…
January 21, 2025
BlogLiving Intentionally
Who Has It Worse? It’s the wrong question.
These days, it feels like we’re racing to prove which sex has it harder—males or females. On any given day, the media serves up plenty of fodder to feed the debate. Boys are struggling in school. No, girls are struggling…
January 15, 2025
BlogLiving Intentionally
5 Realizations of Parenting
by Todd Adams I have three daughters - 21, 20, and 17. I have been speaking to groups of parents since we began our podcast 15 years ago. Along the way, I have come to certain realizations that have helped…
January 7, 2025
BlogLiving Intentionally
The Stars Know
by Dan Gathof You Know What Your Problem Is? The Stars Know… For some time (one week to be exact), I’ve immersed myself in the mysteries of the zodiac, delving into celestial charts and uncovering the cosmic forces that shape…
January 7, 2025
BlogLiving Intentionally
Intentions.
A new year often inspires reflection and motivation for change. If new year’s resolutions work for you, great - but they’re not for everyone. Personally, I’m not a big fan of resolutions - or goals in general. Real sustainable change…
December 30, 2024
BlogElders
The Power of Connection
by Dr. Paul Ward Connecting is my word for the new year. In our fast-paced, digital world, the concept of connecting has taken on new meanings. While technology has made it easier than ever to stay in touch, the essence…
December 27, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Dan’s Here to Grant Your Career Wish
by Dan Gathof You know what your problem is…You tell me The holiday season always reminds me of how cool it was to be a kid. I’ve written before about my childhood, which was full of freedom and only two…
December 23, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Relationship Status? It’s Complicated.
by Mike Rosen To those of you who celebrate Christmas, a Merry Christmas to you and the people in your life. To those who don’t observe Christmas, Happy Wednesday and Holidays to you and the people in your life! Knee…
December 19, 2024
Blog
Restoring Our Girls: How the Men in Their Lives Can Make a Difference
By Cathy Adams Hey dads, grandpas, uncles, brothers, and anyone with a young woman aged 12 to 25 in your life… If that's you, I’d like to offer a perspective on their experiences. Of course, young women are not a…
December 17, 2024
BlogLiving Candidly
An Utterly Confusing Reaction
By Jason Samatas Two weeks ago, a United Health Care CEO was gunned down in downtown Manhattan. This is nothing short of a tragedy. The victim was a small-town Iowan who grew up on a family farm, earned his way…
December 17, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
What Would You Do?
by Dan Gathof You know what your problem is…I’m uncomfortable telling you If an employee makes a joke that slightly edges on discrimination, do you say something? What if addressing the situation requires you to document it and involve HR?…
December 17, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
It’s a Small World After All
by Jim Herbert A few months before I was born back in 1964, the most frequently played song in the history of all songwriting debuted at the World’s Fair in New York. The song was not written for a person.…
December 10, 2024
Blog
You’re Too Close to the Edge
by Dan Gathof “I wonder what would happen if I jumped?” Standing on a cliff, 80 feet above jagged rocks jutting out of the ocean, the answer seemed obvious: a searing jolt of pain, followed swiftly by a meeting with…
December 10, 2024
BlogElders
Why the Best Love and Sex of Your Life is Possible After 40
Aging can be challenging -- physically, emotionally, and relationally. The concept of a midlife crisis points to the fact that, at this time of life, we often start to look differently at ourselves, our relationships and our lives. We look…
December 8, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
Loving Everyone
Let’s talk about the L-word. Love. How do you feel when you use the L-word? Excited? Emotional? Afraid? Uncomfortable? Maybe all of the above. The question reminds me of those TV shows and movies where characters are either scolded for…
December 4, 2024
BlogLiving Healthy
You know what your problem is…Your breath stinks!
by Dan Gathof Some psychologists estimate that the average person complains between 15 to 30 times a day, often without realizing they’re doing it. What's wrong with you people?!! On top of that, research shows that complaining can have serious…
December 3, 2024
BlogLiving EmotionallyLiving Intentionally
Are You Turning It Outward?
by Todd Adams When MenLiving started in 2012, the vision was simple but powerful: to create deeper, more genuine connections among men. Fast forward to 2024, and I’m proud to say that vision has become a reality for so many…
November 26, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
“What do you not want to be in when it breaks down?”
By Dan Gathof You know what your problem is…No Ray to Steer You “What do you not want to be in when it breaks down?” This was one of the Family Feud questions during our Thanksgiving dinner in 2018. My…
November 26, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
Recognizing & Communicating Your Needs
By Donald Bilakowski This week, let’s talk about your needs. Why? Because understanding and communicating your needs is essential for building healthy, connected relationships – something we are very interested in here at MenLiving. But what don’t know what your…
November 19, 2024
Blog
You Know What Your Problem Is … Advertising
By Dan Gathof You know what your problem is…you’re a B210 We know that advertising works in our society. Sales for Doritos tend to go up 10%+ following their Super Bowl ads, Chevy dealerships see a spike the week after…
November 19, 2024
Blog
You’re Overthinking It
by Dan Gathof This is for those of you with a strong conscience and a high degree of thoughtfulness. As for the rest of you, go ahead and head back to your mirror. So you just accepted a job and…
November 12, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Master, Master
by Mike Rosen Growing up there was a kid in my neighborhood who was a huge Metallica fan, I wasn’t. Our house was more Willie Nelson, John Denver, Kenny Rogers, and Neil Diamond. You get the idea, a tad softer.…
November 12, 2024
BlogLiving Connected
The Gift of Silence
by Tony Schmidt "Silence is a rare gift in our busy world." For more than 8 years, I have participated in a monthly men’s group meeting that takes place outside of our MenLiving offerings. Much like MenLiving meetings, we share…
November 11, 2024
BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Emotionally
When the Past Comes Back, Uninvited!
by Martin Mcleish I should be angry, I think. Instead, I am experiencing a huge upwelling of grief. My younger brother and I had been estranged for some seven years. Two weeks ago, I suddenly had contact from him on…
November 5, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
You know what your problem is…Answering Back
by Dan Gathof They say there are three surefire ways to start a fight: talk politics, bring up religion, or ask about someone’s salary. So let’s talk politics. Like many of you, I’m excited for this election to be over. …
November 5, 2024
BlogLiving Connected
Immersion
by Jason Samatas MenLiving offers the community so much; places for connection, small batches, specialty programs and meetings, and immersive weekends and Advances. I’ve attended and led many MenLiving weekends over the years. I’ve also attended immersive men’s weekends outside…
October 29, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
You keep turning the wrong corner
by Dan Gathof With Halloween just around the corner, the air is filled with a backdrop of thrills, excitement, and fear. One of my Halloween memories scared the pants off of me - though, to be fair, I wasn’t wearing…
October 29, 2024
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Conflict Resolution and Corned Beef Sandwiches: Life Lessons Learned at a World Famous Deli
by Jim Herbert If you’ve seen the movie When Harry Met Sally, you will certainly recall the “I’ll have what she’s having” scene which was filmed at world-famous Katz’s Delicatessen in New York City. In that scene, Harry, played by…
October 22, 2024
Blog
You know what your problem is … No Common Scents
by Dan Gathof Sometimes, a little laugh goes a long way. This project of being human can be really difficult. Like, really difficult. It’s hard to understand the constant pressure and stress that weighs us down. Silent mental anguish often…
October 22, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
What about the men?
For decades, my mornings have started with a review of the day’s papers: the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Chicago Tribune. Sadly, I’ve often awakened to reports of mass killings and acts of war. Journalists consistently highlight the…
October 16, 2024BlogLiving CandidlyUncategorized
You know what your problem is…You don’t “no”
by Dan Gathof Years ago, I did something bold—something that straddled the line between bravery and foolishness. I wrote a manifesto. Not only did I write it, but I published the 15-page pamphlet and mailed it out to clients and…
October 15, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
The Airport Guy: Judgmental or Curious?
by Todd Adams I recently flew home from a trip to Oregon with my oldest daughter, Jacey. We sat down for a pre-flight breakfast when something at the next table caught my attention. A man, maybe a little older than…
October 8, 2024
BlogLiving Candidly
You Know What Your Problem Is … Own It
by Dan Gathoff Day 2 of our hiking and biking trip was shaping up to be a challenge. Our goal? Conquering a 2,000-foot mountain. The catch? We had two ways up: an unforgiving biking route packed with switchbacks and thigh-burning…
October 8, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
Five Losing Strategies in Relationships
By Donald Bialkowski Ever found yourself in a relationship where your needs aren’t being met? Of course you have, it’s part of being in relationships! How you handle them is what makes all the difference. I often say to my…
October 1, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
You Know What Your Problem Is … Apathy
By Dan Gathof After what seems like an eternity, you’ve finally landed the meeting. The hours spent rehearsing your pitch, anticipating every possible question, and crafting responses designed to impress have all led to this moment. The night before, you…
October 1, 2024
BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Intentionally
Right but Dead
by Mike Rosen That’s me on my brand-new 1978 Schwinn Sting Ray, my 7th birthday. It was the first bike that was MINE mine, not a hand-me-down from either of my older siblings. This gift would change my life in…
September 24, 2024
BlogLiving IntentionallyUncategorized
Stop Settling
by Dan Gathof Settle: to accept or agree to something that one considers to be less than satisfactory. Settling is one of those words many of us choose to avoid. It’s the proverbial monster under the bed, the name that…
September 24, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Bad Habits
by Jason Samatas Yesterday I had a conversation with my father. Over the course of my life, I’ve had a very challenging relationship with him, which was further complicated due to my working for his company for almost twenty years.…
September 17, 2024
BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Emotionally
Heat and Shadows
by Jim Herbert With Labor Day comes the unofficial end of summer and beginning of fall. As the month of September transitions us in the northern hemisphere to longer nights and shorter days, there aretwo things you can count on.…
September 10, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Less May Be More
By Dan Gathof In a world that was always racing, where speed and efficiency was prized above all else, there lived two unlikely competitors: a Hare and a Tortoise. They had known each other for years, but things had changed…
September 10, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
You know what your problem is…
For those who are avid business book readers or keen consumers of business insights, you’ve likely encountered Simon Sinek’s Golden Circle model. If you haven’t, it’s worth a quick search—there are plenty of articles and videos that explain it in…
September 3, 2024
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Nine Weeks Left
By Jason Samatas For those of you who know me and/or have read my previous blogs, I’m very engaged in national politics. I have been so since college, but actually remember being engaged, I guess as much as a kid…
September 3, 2024
BlogLiving Connected
Some Thoughts on Men Who Cry
by Todd Adams Over the past few years, I’ve been on a journey of self-compassion, especially when it comes to expressing my emotions—especially sadness through tears. What I've discovered is that my ability to be gentle with myself allows me…
August 27, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Lazy meets Entertaining!
by Dan Gathof Nearly 14 years ago, I surprised our kids with a puppy. They were thrilled to welcome a new pet, and Holly, our puggle, certainly lived up to the excitement. Small in size but big in personality, Holly…
August 27, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
“When do I help someone in need?”
CRASH! The deafening explosion shattered the stillness of my home office, jolting me upright. The violence of it, so sudden and unexpected, left me momentarily stunned. My heart pounded as I sprang from my chair, adrenaline surging through my veins.…
August 21, 2024
BlogLiving Connected
Helping, Fixing, Serving
by Mike Rosen “Helping, fixing and serving represent three different ways of seeing life. When you help, you see life as weak. When you fix, you see life as broken. When you serve, you see life as whole. Fixing…
August 20, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Social Proof
When I first started my executive recruiting business, I had zero experience acquiring clients; my background was purely internal HR and recruiting. So, when a colleague from a top consulting firm asked if I’d speak with one of their partners…
August 14, 2024
BlogFriendshipLiving Connected
Cheers, To Eldership
By Dr Bill Chaney Becoming an Elder In discussing our favorite authors with a good friend in MenLiving, I told him that I especially like J.R.R. Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings. Perhaps you also enjoy reading some of the books…
August 13, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Your Manhood is Getting in the Way
A dinger of a story from Paris this week “Olympics pole vaulter's manhood mishap costs him medal chance…” Normally I don’t bite on such clickbait titles, but there were so many other headlines on the same topic that I needed…
August 7, 2024
Blog
Richard Renaldi….Disturbed Harmonies
From Artist Richard Renaldi about his collection, Disturbed Harmonies: Men are troubled across this troubled Earth. Economic and political power have failed to assuage their anxiety. Physical strength offers only the illusion of protection. Although male supremacy was never foreordained,…
August 7, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Man vs. Machine Round #1: The Dehumanization of Writing
By Jim Herbert Do you remember the voice that shattered the glass goblet? Back when I was a young boy growing up in metro Detroit in the early 1970s, jazz legend Ella Fitzgerald famously became the spokeswoman for Memorex audio…
August 6, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Bobbing For Gold
Did you know that the mascot of the 2024 Paris Olympics is a hat? And did you see the swimming event where “Bob the Cap Catcher” paraded out in his colorful speedo to rescue a stray swimming cap? Were you…
July 30, 2024
BlogLiving Candidly
The Rattlesnakes that Stalk Me
by Shaun Emerson A couple of months ago, I went out hiking on my favorite trail in Palm Springs, the Museum Trail. I’ve taken this trek dozens of times over the last five years. On most of these hikes, I…
July 30, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
PDNA & FOCUS
Do you know people who like to putz? You know the type: a person who procrastinates, starts but rarely finishes projects, is indecisive, avoids any commitment, is easily distracted, and fairly unorganized. This is the same person who tells you…
July 24, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Unwinnable
When I was 12 years old, I found myself in New York City at a 3-card monte table with a Mormon boy my age whom I had recently met on a ski trip. Quick disclaimer - there is so much…
July 16, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
It’s Obvious, Child
by Mike Rosen ‘Sonny sits by his window and thinks to himself How it's strange that some rooms are like cages I’m rediscovering Paul Simon’s 1990 album ‘Rhythm of the Saints’. It was his 8th solo album and the lead…
July 16, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
The AI Storm
How are you genuinely feeling today? Enough about you, let’s talk about me. I’m getting nervous about AI and what this means for people’s career paths. As AI continues to advance, many people are understandably nervous about how it might…
July 10, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
The Unpredictability of Life
By Jason Samatas One of the things I’m working harder at appreciating is the unpredictability of life. It seems every time I feel like I have a handle on life, how it works, and what it all means, I get…
July 9, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Malort Over Manhattans
What are your salary expectations? If you are like many, this question from a recruiter immediately triggers you to go into lockdown mode - retreat, clench, protect, defend, clench some more. You view the question as the ultimate set-up and…
July 2, 2024
BlogLiving EmotionallyLiving Intentionally
Embracing the Hero Within
by Jim Herbert Every summer when I was a kid my mom, dad and I would make the long drive from Detroit to New York to visit my paternal grandparents who lived in a little village named Pelham, just north…
July 2, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Be One.
I find this quote thought-provoking: “Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.” While the message itself is inspiring, it depresses me that it was made around 1,900 years ago by Marcus Aurelius. It…
June 25, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
Integration of the Head and Heart in a Medical Career
by Brett Linzer Thirty years ago I entered Loyola Medical School and my initiation into the culture of medicine began. As best as I could at the time, I prepared myself for the challenges ahead. I aimed to cultivate a…
June 25, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Don’t Settle For Dirty Bath Water
I often wonder if a lack of imagination and fear are two sides of the same coin. Soon after we had our fourth child, my wife and I faced the challenging decision of whether to move to a larger house…
June 18, 2024
BlogLiving Emotionally
Is Joy Reserved for the Youth?
By Todd Adams During most MenLiving meetings, we start with a check-in process. Last week, I led our very first Friday meeting, and I chose the topic of emotions, which is the 3rd of the Five MenLiving Suggestions. The main…
June 18, 2024
Blog
MenLiving Suggestion #6. Living Authentically?
by Mike Rosen I enjoy writing these blog posts, it’s a very mindful and deliberate act for me. How can I express something meaningful and constructive, insightful enough to (hopefully) warrant the time you took to read it, is engaging,…
June 11, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Change Agent
Every two years in the town I live in, the city conducts “Amnesty Day', an opportunity for residents to throw away as much stuff as they want. It’s a bit of a mini-holiday for all of us as it resembles…
June 5, 2024
BlogLiving Candidly
America is Guilty
by Jason Samatas Last week, former President Donald J. Trump was convicted in a New York court for crimes related to the 2016 election and the paying of hush money to a porn star. No matter where you fit on…
June 4, 2024
Living HealthyLiving Intentionally
Exploring the Link Between Testosterone Levels and Masculinity
by Jim Herbert Back in the late 70s, I used to rush home from school to watch General Hospital on TV with my mom. This was long before the advent of DVRs or even VCRs, so if I wanted to…
May 28, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
The Look
Back in 2005, a company called CI Host offered to pay individuals to tattoo their foreheads with the company's logo in exchange for a lifetime hosting package for their website. Several people accepted the offer, receiving tattoos of the CI…
May 27, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Gravel, 68 mph, Bubblrs.
By Mike Rosen My advanced age brings much, some gray hair, regular prostate checks, the usual. It also brings a deeper well of memories and its edgy cousin nostalgia. Remember MTv? Of the many plusses as I advance is a…
May 21, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Ghosting
There are some terrible recruiters out there. Which isn’t stating a whole lot because there are also awful CEOS, incompetent sales managers, and unfriendly workers at the DMV. I think the area where recruiters take the biggest rap is in…
May 18, 2024
BlogLiving Candidly
Man Vs Bear
by Todd Adams It’s been a thought experiment for a couple of weeks now: a TikTok question that asks, “Would you rather be stuck in a forest with a man or a bear?” With the majority of women answering, “bear.” When my wife…
May 14, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Questions from the Male Bag
Over the years I’ve received many candidate questions that I’m not sure I’m qualified to answer. The questions have more to do with applying good business judgment than necessarily solid recruiter advice. So I’m offering this Male Bag of questions…
May 13, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Greenlights
By Jason Samatas I feel fortunate and grateful that I get the opportunity to show up to so many different MenLiving spaces, whether it be Full Houses, specialized meetings on interesting topics, or Weekend Advances. They are all special in…
May 7, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
The Question Behind the Question
My favorite artist at present, the one who provokes my thinking, creates ongoing intrigue, and occasionally makes me laugh is...Banksy. For those of you unfamiliar with Banksy, he is an anonymous British street artist known for his provocative and politically…
May 5, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
It’s ok to be Patagonia
If you could pack your bags and go anywhere in the world next year, where would you choose to go? For my wife and me, that question became a reality as we hit a triple witching event in our life;…
April 28, 2024
Living Intentionally
Skating on Thin Ice
by Jim Herbert The Chase For the Cup It’s that time of year again! This past Sunday marked the beginning of the Stanley Cup Playoffs, which for my money is still the best sports tournament on the planet. Teams that…
April 23, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Nerves
Do you ever have those occasions where you are nervous? Not the “kind-of” nervous feeling but the “totally-skittish-I-can’t-settle-myself-down” nervous feeling? I had one of those recently, right before giving one of the most important speeches in my life. I was…
April 21, 2024
Blog
Silly, isn’t it?
Have you heard about the new telehealth startups pitching GLP-1s specifically to men? The New York Times has, and they recently asked the question, “Is the Era of ‘Brozempic’ Upon Us?” Ugh. Two companies, Fella Health, and Blokes are using…
April 17, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Zwifting Through Your Struggles
A few months ago I started Zwifting. For those of you unfamiliar with it, zwift is basically an online platform where you can ride (or run) in a virtual world. It's like a video game for exercise bikes. You can…
April 14, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
If You Want to Go Far, Go Together
by Todd Adams I have always loved swimming, and I especially enjoy it as a form of exercise. For the last few years, I have been swimming laps in the pool every few weeks simply to mix up my workouts.…
April 9, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
You Need to Step to the Left
Photography buffs know that composition plays a significant role in taking an effective photo. Considering what elements to include as well as framing, perspective, balance, and symmetry all help the photographer tell a particular story. Such is the case with…
April 6, 2024
BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Connected
My Mind Is Blank
by Jason Samatas Sometimes I have so much to say that I scare myself on just how much I can talk. And other times, not so much. About every four weeks, I am given the opportunity to write the weekly…
April 2, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Are you a storytelling Jedi??
There is so much that divides our country. We continue to passionately disagree on social issues such as abortion, gun rights, gender equality, economic disparities, climate issues, etc. and of course, we are split on if Democratic or Republican leadership…
March 30, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Hello, Friend.
By Mike Rosen This week, the featured post is authored by MenLiving facilitator, Mike Rosen. Mike is a father, a 4th grade teacher and has been the lead on our Tuesday night seperation / divorce meeting since its inception. …
March 27, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Is your resume a “singing holiday tie?”
As a recruiter, opening a candidate's resume feels like a mini-Christmas morning to me. There's a bubbling excitement and anticipation as I click on the PDF icon. Will this be the amazing gift I was looking for? Will it exceed…
March 26, 2024
Living Connected
Feeling All the Feels and the Neighborhood of Make-Believe
by Jim Herbert Jim is passionate about life and he explores his individual hero’s journey with curiosity and zeal. Jim is a father, husband, yogi, mystic, storyteller, author, coach, teacher and student who sees himself as a spiritual being having…
March 19, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Do You Know Where You Are Going?
Years ago, I saw a cartoon depicting a group of explorers deep in the heart of a jungle, using machetes to hack their way through heavy brush and vines. The caption of the cartoon had one individual saying to another,…
March 19, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Oblivious?
Last week in our Weekly email, I share the exchange I had with Joan Dyer about the development of a men focused employee resource group and whether or not we should call it You Matter. Marti, a MenLiving friend and wife…
March 13, 2024BlogLiving HealthyLiving Intentionally
You hate to lose
Remember the old phrase “be careful what you wish for!” It implies that sometimes, what we wish for may not turn out as expected, and could even have negative or unintended outcomes. In my experience, there is only one exception…
March 10, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
Too Much Head Trash
I sometimes wonder if recruiters need to be trained psychologists. I often deal with complex people issues. So often in conversations, candidates share big fears, concerns and insecurities that they have in the work environment. They share things like they…
March 6, 2024
Living Connected
The Different “Parts” of MenLiving
By Todd Adams This week, the featured post is authored by Todd Adams, MenLiving Executive Director & Co-founder I have been a fan of personal growth books, podcasts, in-person trainings, etc. for a long time. Over the last few years…
March 5, 2024
BlogLiving Healthy
Check, Please with Mike Rosen
Quick. Without pause, answer this question with a Yes or No. Are you healthy? Hmmm. What did you answer? It’s not really an easy or fair question to answer straight away. My answer is “Yes (for the most part. I…
February 27, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
You let others think for you
I had an interesting exchange recently with a candidate who was preparing for an interview. A portion of our conversation went something like this: Candidate: Dan how do I answer the question “What is my biggest weakness” Dan: Well, what…
February 27, 2024
Living Emotionally
Letter To My Son
Written by MenLiving Community Member, Dan Silberberg Dear Son: As I sit down to write this letter, I find myself reflecting on a journey that has shaped the person and leader I am today. It's a journey I wish to…
February 25, 2024
BlogLiving EmotionallyLiving Intentionally
Traveling to Another World
By Jason Samatas I’m a bit of a political junkie. I recall it was back in college when I first started enjoying politics. I enjoyed understanding how our government worked (or tried to work), as well as the strategy the…
February 20, 2024BlogLiving Intentionally
“You know what your problem is?”
Like many people, I tend to use targeted humor when addressing challenging topics. Regardless of the audience, this approach helps me in communicating a difficult point without creating any sort of tension or negative emotion. So whenever I have a…
February 19, 2024
Living Intentionally
Do the work!
So.......... I have been debating whether to post about what was going on for a few days this week. On the one hand I feel reluctant, on the other keen to share. Reluctant? Yeah! I talk and do stuff I…
February 19, 2024
BlogLiving Connected
The Psychology of Love
by Jim Herbert Jim is passionate about life and he explores his individual hero’s journey with curiosity and zeal. Jim is a father, husband, yogi, mystic, storyteller, author, coach, teacher and student who sees himself as a spiritual being having…
February 13, 2024
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
DIY
On the fourth episode of our podcast, If You’ve Come This Far, Chris and I interviewed Billy Baker, a Boston Globe columnist and the author of “We Need to Hang Out.” In his book, Baker recounts his efforts to make…
February 7, 2024
BlogLiving Connected
Do You Ask for Support?
By Todd Adams This week, the featured post is authored by Todd Adams, MenLiving Executive Director & Co-founder I've been immersed in men's work for over 15 years, and a decade ago, I co-founded MenLiving, eventually taking on the role…
January 30, 2024
Living Connected
Round and Round and Round It Goes
By Michael Eatmon This week, the featured post is authored by Michael Eatmon. Michael’s a career educator. For over 30 years, he’s studied and taught language, philosophy, and theology. What feeds his embodied soul, though, are art, music, poetry, yoga, and the…
January 23, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
June 7, 2018. Depression Lies.
By Mike Rosen This week, the featured post is authored by MenLiving facilitator, Mike Rosen. Mike is a father, a 4th grade teacher and has been the lead on our Tuesday night seperation / divorce meeting since its inception. …
January 16, 2024
BlogLiving EmotionallyLiving Intentionally
There Isn’t Always an Answer
By Jason Samatas A long-time Chicagoan, Jason now lives in a part of the country he’s always dreamed of living: near the mountains. Just outside of Boulder, CO, Jason now enjoys all that living in the West provides, although he…
January 9, 2024
BlogLiving Intentionally
Charting an Intentional Path for 2024
by Jim Herbert Jim is passionate about life and he explores his individual hero’s journey with curiosity and zeal. Jim is a father, husband, yogi, mystic, storyteller, author, coach, teacher and student who sees himself as a spiritual being having…
January 2, 2024
BlogFriendship
What is a friend?
Last week, my friend, Tracy Brown, sent this quote that is attributed to poet C. Raymond Beran to me and Todd Adams. In his email to us, he wrote, "I know how much you guys are doing to build bridges…
December 26, 2023
BlogLiving Emotionally
The Unbidden Guest
By Michael Eatmon This week, the featured post is authored by Michael Eatmon. Michael’s a career educator. For 30 years, he’s studied and taught language, philosophy, and theology. What feeds his embodied soul, though, are art, music, poetry, yoga, and…
December 19, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
Decoding Life: What Meaning Are You Giving This Situation??
The author of this piece is MenLiving friend and Positive Masculinity Coach, Lark Ericson, RN, LF, In a world overflowing with information we find ourselves just trying to keep our heads above water perpetually caught in the crossfire of data…
December 18, 2023
BlogMeet MenLiving
What’s on the Menu?
by Todd Adams, MenLiving Executive Director & Co-founder There’s a great scene in the movie My Cousin Vinny where Vinny, played by Joe Pesci, goes to a small-town restaurant with his wife and sits down to look at the menu.…
December 5, 2023
BlogLiving Emotionally
How to be Less Grateful on Thanksgiving
By Jim Herbert This week, the featured post is authored by MenLiving facilitator, Jim Herbert. Jim is a father, husband, yogi, mystic, storyteller, author, coach, teacher and student who sees himself as a spiritual being having an amazing human experience.…
November 21, 2023
BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Emotionally
A Cone of Silence
Like many “men’s groups,” at the beginning of most MenLiving Full House meetings, the host will ask the men present to raise their hands and make a pledge of confidentiality. In essence, we all agree to uphold the idea that…
November 15, 2023
BlogLiving IntentionallyUncategorized
Three Alarms
By Mike Rosen This week, the featured post is authored by MenLiving facilitator, Mike Rosen. Mike is a father, a 4th grade teacher and has been the lead on our Tuesday night seperation / divorce meeting since its inception. …
November 7, 2023
BlogLiving Emotionally
Kitchen Candor
By Michael Eatmon This week, the featured post is authored by Michael Eatmon. Michael’s a career educator. For 30 years, he’s studied and taught language, philosophy, and theology. What feeds his embodied soul, though, are art, music, poetry, yoga, and…
October 31, 2023
BlogLiving IntentionallyUncategorized
Not Wrong, Just Different
By Mike Rosen. Mike is a father, a 4th grade teacher and has been the lead on our Tuesday night seperation / divorce meeting since its inception. At the risk of appearing overly self-deprecating, I'm going to begin today’s…
October 24, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
Now is Not the Time to Lose Hope
By Jason Samatas, MenLiving Facilitator Between the recent events in the Middle East, analyzing the political landscape in the United States, and along with a couple of personal issues that arose, I found myself battling with a feeling that I…
October 17, 2023
BlogMeet MenLiving
Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind
This week, the featured post is authored by Jim Herbert. Jim is a MenLiving facilitator, father, husband, yogi, mystic, storyteller, teacher and coach. You can learn more about Jim and The MindSmith Academy at JamesHenryHebert.com Thirty years ago in the…
October 10, 2023
BlogLiving CandidlyLiving Intentionally
The Practice Is Where It’s At
by Michael Eatmon, MenLiving Board Member Last Saturday morning, my quads would have none of it. The yoga instructor called for a standing, bound, revolved figure 4. My lower back and legs laughed at the prospect. My expectations and…
September 26, 2023
BlogLiving ConnectedMeet MenLiving
Not All Men’s Groups are Created Equal
By Jason Samatas, MenLiving Facilitator I've recently started a new relationship with a woman I met about a month ago. A few weeks ago, she invited me to her brother's wedding in Las Vegas – I mean, Vegas, right?! So,…
September 19, 2023
BlogLiving Connected
What Rules Are You Playing By?
If I were to ask you – for the men reading this – “Do your friendships with other guys satisfy you?” I’m guessing you might say “yes”, and I can understand why you respond that way. You have somebody to…
September 12, 2023
Blog
I’m the Pilot
This week, the featured post is authored by MenLiving facilitator, Mike Rosen. Mike is a father, a 4th grade teacher and has been the lead on our Tuesday night seperation / divorce meeting since its inception. ‘Time flies over…
September 5, 2023
Blog
A Good Cry
Last week, in two different virtual meetings, friends of mine got very emotional. One as he read a heart wrenching note from one of his friends. Another as he processed the pain and fatigue of a family in distress. Both…
August 23, 2023
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Collector or Purger?
While I am not sure I pass as a true minimalist, I do live with a minimalist mindset. The famous declutter, Marie Kondo, asks us to consider whether a possession “sparks joy” when we are considering what to do with…
August 16, 2023
BlogLiving Healthy
Men & Health Care: Removing Our Heads From Our Asses
Last month, The American Journal of Men’s Health posted a research article entitled, “Designing Men’s Health Programs: The 5C Framework.” In the article, researchers propose a model to assist practitioners building men’s health programs to improve accessibility and engagement. The…
August 9, 2023
Blog
What is good about masculinity?
I just finished Caitlin Moran’s new book, What About Men? Moran is a decorated British journalist, feminist and the author of previous books, How To Be A Woman, How To Build A Girl and More Than A Woman. Her notion…
August 2, 2023
BlogLiving Candidly
Listen Better
“You are not hearing me.” In 30 years of marriage, I had heard her frustration more than I want to remember. I believe myself to be a good listener. Patient. Empathetic. Curious. I received feedback from others that I was…
July 26, 2023
BlogFriendship
Dating skills to practice on your friends
Kimberley Healey specializes in helping smart, thoughtful people create a deeply satisfying love life. Her work is intuitive, pragmatic and joyous. Each month, Kimberley hosts a Full House exploring dating and relationships. I often refer to MenLiving Connect as our "platonic dating…
July 11, 2023
Blog
The American Institute for Boys and Men
On June 30th, Richard Reeves, author of Of Boys and Men, announced that he would be leaving the Brookings Institution to become President of the American Institute for Boys and Men. This piece is a repost of his announcement from…
July 5, 2023
Blog
The Answer?
When my kids were young (they are now 28, 27, and 23), I would lose my mind when they would say to me, “I can’t.” I can’t ride a bike. I can’t do the math. I can’t parallel park….etc, etc,…
June 28, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
Simple Strategies to Not Let Their Problem Become Your Problem and Interfering with Your Goals
Author: Guy Fitzgerald As a personal trainer and nutrition coach, I often see people who are struggling with their own health and wellness goals because they are so busy allowing other people's problems to become their problem. I am super…
June 13, 2023
Blog
Is June Men’s Health Awareness Month???
Yes, June is Men’s Health Awareness Month. Nice!! Being a leader of an organization that is working to realize a world of HEALTHY, intentional, connected men, I want as many people as possible to understand and appreciate men’s health issues.…
June 7, 2023
Blog
The State of American Men
This article is a repost from Equimondo: Center for Masculinities and Social Justice introducing their report on the state of american men in 2023. This inaugural State of American Men report, “From Crisis and Confusion to Hope,” seeks to understand…
May 31, 2023
Blog
My Mental Health Journey
Author: Jim Schneider Recently, I wrote about the mental health crisis in the construction industry. Dealing with it requires first bringing attention to the problem, and then encouraging individuals who are struggling to get the help they need. That might…
May 22, 2023
Blog
Happy Talk?
Author: Bill Chaney I grew up in a home where warm emotions were scarce. I know my parents did the best they could to meet the challenges they faced. Dad was busy as a carpenter trying to keep food on…
May 22, 2023
Blog
The Gentleman of the East – Five behaviours of a traditional Indian gentleman
Author: Aditya Ganjoo The development of civilisations across the world allowed humans to feel safer, and thus, focus on other aspects of life, apart from survival. Probably, that is where the gentleman developed. In every tribe, and in every civilisation.…
May 10, 2023
Blog
The Mental Health Crisis in the Construction Industry
On Monday, May 15th at 7PM CT, MenLiving will host its first Construction Full House. The Construction Full House is one small way MenLiving is supporting the effort to address the mental health crisis in the industry. Community Member Jim…
May 8, 2023
Blog
Human vs. Machine
I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed by all the dialogue re: AI these days. I get it’s a big deal, and like all big deals, our culture will give it non-stop attention. I suppose the…
May 2, 2023
Living Healthy
Why is the U.S. life expectancy gap between men and women widening?
WBEZ Chicago | Reset with Sasha-Ann Simons | 31 min In 2021, the U.S. life expectancy was about 73 years for men and about 79 years for women – the biggest gap in a quarter-century. By Micah Yason April 25, 2023,…
April 26, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
Stop Scrolling and Start Connecting
Before I get into the heart of today’s topic, I need to set it up with a little personal background. In the mid-80’s, my first post graduate job was selling computers for Digital Equipment Corporation (DEC). I worked for DEC…
April 19, 2023
Blog
“Masculinity, in many ways, is a performance.”
Yesterday, I was reading the transcript of a recent episode of the NPR podcast, Life Kit, with Frank Festa, entitled, “Defining masculinity on your own terms.” In the podcast, one of the guests says, “Masculinity, in many ways, is a…
April 5, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
Featuring Fear- Jumping into the ditch with eyes on the bell
Author: Aditya Ganjoo I was lingering at the third last rung of an approximately ten metre tall Jacob’s ladder. Just one more rung to climb for transitioning to the other side for descending. I know that my fear of heights…
March 28, 2023
Blog
Befriending My Inner Critic
Author: Jim Schneider Like many people, I have an annoyingly loud inner critic. And when I say “loud,” I mean I he walks around in my head with one of those bullhorns that has flashing lights and sound effects, just…
March 28, 2023
BlogLiving Healthy
Jaw-Dropping
A few months back, I wrote a post called “Short King or Daddy Long Legs” that explored the practice of leg lengthening by men. A ghastly and painful exercise just to get a few inches taller. Well, as a man…
March 22, 2023
Blog
Checking with Mr Nice Guy
I met Aditya Ganjoo for the first time last Saturday morning at a Full House meeting. For him, it was 9:30PM local time in New Delhi and he was attending his first ML event. He engaged with authenticity and vulnerability.…
March 15, 2023
Blog
Welcome, Pain.
Community Member, Martin McLeish, shares his experiences participating in the Self-Compassion Small Batch. The ice exercise he references at the beginning of the piece requires the participant to hold a piece of ice until the pain becomes unbearable and then invites…
March 7, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
Reciprocity
A couple of weeks ago, I was having a conversation with Michael Pealow, a social innovation consultant working with Indigenous men in the Yukon. He shared with me that he subscribes to a “mind model” that views everything as energy,…
March 1, 2023
Blog
Why Boys Stop Reading?
Writer, Matt Haig, posted this piece on his Instagram. I wanted to share his interesting data and perspective. Thoughts? At age 11, most boys enjoy reading. By 14 that drops from 65% to 32%. In other words, we lose half…
February 22, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
Purpose?
Over the last week, I have found myself in multiple conversations about purpose. First, Chris Lozier and I interviewed Nico Lagan for an upcoming episode of our podcast, If You’ve Come This Far. Nico is “a men's coach, an entrepreneur,…
February 15, 2023
Blog
Macho, Macho Man
A couple of days ago, my friend, Chris, and I were talking about the construction industry. I had recently learned that our friend, Paul Sullivan, Founder of Company of Dads, had been interviewed on the “Mothers in Construction” podcast. An…
February 8, 2023
BlogLiving Healthy
Meet Guy Fitzgerald
Starting today, we will be adding a Healthy Tip of The Week to our weekly email. Given our vision of a world of healthy, intentional, connected men, we thought it was appropriate to talk about health (physical and mental) on…
February 1, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
All the Light I Need
In his latest Monster Whisperer video, Jimmy Talarico introduces one of his art pieces, entitled “All the Light I Need,” to make a point about moving out of the darkness and into the light. I was immediately attracted to this…
January 25, 2023
Blog
Jobs Wanted
On Tuesday’s episode of Zen Parenting Radio, a podcast cohosted by our Executive Director, Todd Adams and his wife, Cathy, the Adams talked about her mom’s recent passing (Judy Cassani passed away on January 9th…Condolences, Cathy 🙏). During the discussion,…
January 18, 2023
Blog
Sexual Creative Energy
I am a big fan of Conscious Leadership Group (CLG). CLG is run by Jim Dethmer (you can listen to Jim on our podcast here) and Diana Chapman. MenLiving’s 5 Suggestions are influenced by the work of CLG. One of…
January 11, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
Top 5
My good friend, Tommy Skelly, will often proclaim that some thing or event is in his "Top 5." For example, Top 5 Root Beer Floats, Top 5 Golf Courses, Top 5 Bus Rides, or Top 5 Showers (for pressure). So…
January 4, 2023
BlogLiving Intentionally
The Clock (s) Are Ticking.
“Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways.” Stephen Vincent Benet I find our culture’s “end of year” energy interesting. The mass media has…
December 28, 2022
Blog
Good, Good, Good?
I subscribe to the good good good newspaper. According to their website, Good Good Good is the media company that helps you feel more hopeful and do more good. I am all in on feeling more hopeful and having more…
December 14, 2022
BlogLiving Intentionally
Life is Full of Challengeable Moments???
The National Football League has a rule called the Coaches’ Challenge. The Challenge works as follows: In each game, a team will be permitted two challenges that will initiate Instant Replay reviews. The Head Coach will initiate a challenge by…
November 30, 2022
Blog
Holly…A Love Story
Community Member, Martin McLeish, shares a story of struggle, love and living in the moment. November 1987 “Fuck it”, I said. I had had enough. I was the explosives guy at the Silver lake Mine in the Kalgoorlie area. This…
November 30, 2022
BlogLiving Connected
Better Than A Gratitude Rock
On this day before Thanksgiving, I am thinking I suppose appropriately about gratitude. But I am thinking about it in a little more twisted way than you might expect. In the information diet that I choose to consume, I see…
November 23, 2022
Blog
My One for the World Story
I’m a senior in college, living in Durango, Colorado, and grew up in a nice suburb of Chicago. I have a loving family, I’ve always had a warm bed to sleep, more food than I need, and have the privilege…
November 23, 2022
Blog
Short King or Daddy Long Legs?
I recently read that the new UK Prime Minister, Rishi Sunak, is regarded as a Short King (he's 5' 7"). Short King? I had never heard the term before though I had a pretty good idea what it was all…
November 16, 2022
BlogLiving ConnectedMeet MenLiving
Introducing MenLiving Connect
My first friend that I remember was Sean Fitzpatrick. Second Grade. Sean and I were on the nerdy side. Studious. We liked books. It’s possible we were drawn together by our same first name, but I don’t recall how big…
November 9, 2022
Blog
“He Was A Man”
On July 31, Bill Russell died at the age of 88. He was a once in a generation athlete known primarily for his time as the center of the Boston Celtics collecting 11 NBA titles in 13 seasons. I grew…
November 2, 2022
BlogLiving Intentionally
BEING
A piece from Bob McKinnon. He is a writer, designer, podcast host, children’s author and teacher. Last week, I took a few minutes to create a list of all the major things I’ve done professionally so far this year. While…
October 26, 2022
Blog
MenLiving Thought Leader: An Interview with Dr. Frank Keil on Wonder
In this edition of the MenLiving Thought Leader Series, Patrick NcKenna interviews Dr. Frank Keil, Professor of Cognitive Science and Director of the Cognition and Development Lab at Yale University, and author of the book, Wonder: Childhood and the Lifelong Love of Science.…
October 19, 2022
BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving Suggestions for Living Fully: Live Intentionally
MenLiving wants to see a world of healthy, intentional, connected men. To make that vision a reality, we create spaces where men can connect, heal, and thrive. We also offer simple suggestions for how they might live life more fully.…
October 19, 2022BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving Suggestions for Living Fully: Live Candidly
MenLiving wants to see a world of healthy, intentional, connected men. To make that vision a reality, we create spaces where men can connect, heal, and thrive. We also offer simple suggestions for how they might live life more fully.…
October 11, 2022
BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving Suggestions for Living Fully: Live Emotionally
MenLiving isn’t about creeds or gurus or judgments. Still, we believe that some approaches to life can lead to greater contentment. With that objective in mind, we created a list of 5 suggestions for living more fully for your consideration, hopeful that…
October 4, 2022
Blog
The Crisis of Men and Boys
I am a fan of David Brooks and have been reading his New York Time column for a long time. Last Friday, he posted the following piece on the struggles of boys and men in our society. Most of the…
October 4, 2022BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving Suggestions for Living Fully: Live Curiously
MenLiving isn’t about creeds or gurus or judgments. Still, we believe that some approaches to life can lead to greater contentment. With that objective in mind, we created a list of 5 suggestions for living more fully for your consideration, hopeful that…
September 27, 2022
Blog
Saved by Loving Kindness
A couple of weeks ago, Todd Adams, MenLiving's Executive Director, sent a video to contributing members sharing news on the suicide ideation training MenLiving facilitators completed with NAMI. In response, Martin McLeish sent the following note... About fifteen years after…
September 27, 2022BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving Suggestions for Living Fully: Live Consciously
MenLiving isn’t about creeds or gurus or judgments. Still, we believe that some approaches to life can lead to greater contentment. With that objective in mind, we created a list of 5 suggestions for living more fully for your consideration, hopeful that…
September 21, 2022BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving evolving…
MenLiving exists because men are bad at friendship, the lack of friendship leads to greater levels of anxiety, depression and death, and men die earlier than women, and at an ever-increasing rate, by their own hand. Some might suggest or…
September 13, 2022
Blog
Redefining Sensitivity As An Essential Trait in Boys: MenLiving Speaks with Writer Elisse Gabriel
The ways that word association and the assumptions that may follow interact with each other have always had cultural meaning behind it. When we hear words like "joy" and "sadness," they usually bring clear understanding of what’s happening. Using the…
September 6, 2022
Blog
What Makes us Happy and What Fills Our Heart Most: An Interview about Life and Fulfilling Relationships with Dr. Belinda Campos
Being able to combine lived experiences with your life’s work is a gift not all of us in the world get to have. For Dr. Belinda Campos, who is a professor in the Department of Chicano/Latino Studies at the University…
August 24, 2022
BlogLiving Intentionally
Self-Acceptance, Self-Love, Integrating All Parts of Myself
Author: Dan Silberberg Carl Jung and Joseph Conrad are inextricably bound in "The Hero's Journey". For me, the "false self", the mask I use to be lovable, to be acceptable to others, and to project myself into the world has…
August 17, 2022
Blog
Mentorship, Affirming Education and Changing the World for the Better: MenLiving Speaks with Louie Ortiz-Fonseca of Advocates for Youth
Louie Ortiz-Fonseca knows how great it feels when a mentor sees potential in someone and helps grow and blossom that potential, almost like a beautiful plant that takes time and care. Ortiz-Fonseca, who considers themselves “a child by nonprofits,” has…
August 9, 2022
BlogLiving Healthy
Eight Foods to Supercharge a Man’s Health
This Fitbit blog post from Australian Joel Feren was in my feed yesterday and it intrigued me. I am usually not one for random list blogs, but I was thinking about men's health and it hit me at the right…
August 3, 2022
Blog
The Strides Made and the Work Ahead: Celebrating Bernice Sandler and the Fight for Title IX, 50 Years Later
Telling the story of one of the biggest civil rights leaders in the history of the U.S. is no easy feat. Being able to tell that story in a fascinating, digestible way for young teenage readers can be even more…
July 26, 2022BlogLiving Connected
The Sweet Aroma of Friendship
I live with the perspective that we humans are just animals with consciousness and that consciousness can be good and bad for us. For this piece, I am not going to share any deep philosophical explanation about the merits of this…
July 20, 2022
Blog
How Seeking Out Fun Can Bring Fulfillment, Increase Productivity and Keep You Healthy: MenLiving Speaks with Dr. Mike Rucker
You’ve most likely heard how the old proverb goes: “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” The exact origins aren’t known, but the saying first appeared in James Howell’s “Proverbs in English, Italian, French and Spanish” in…
July 5, 2022
Blog
Men Leaning In
I was on the phone with some buddies the other day- 3 days after the historic overturn of Roe V Wade. Although I found myself thinking quite a bit over the SCOTUS decision, we did not talk about it. Instead,…
June 29, 2022
Blog
Teaching Ethics, Integrity and Healthy Masculinity While Still Remembering Kids are Kids in 2022: MenLiving Speaks with Two Chicago Educators
The job of teaching teenagers is no easy feat. It can be frustrating and exhausting for both new and well-seasoned educators. But for Brandon Woods and Jonathon Legendre, it’s all part of the process of helping develop young minds, with…
June 21, 2022
Blog
Reflections on Fatherhood
Being a father to a child can mean so many things to different people. As Father’s Day approaches, MenLiving wanted to highlight what fatherhood means to some of the dads in our community. Get ready to smile, feel inspired or…
June 15, 2022
Blog
MenLiving Emotionally…A Repost
I am a big fan of Matt Haig and his writing. He is most recently known for the NYT Best Seller, The Midnight Library. I could list the books of his I recommend, but that would be a waste. I…
June 7, 2022
Blog
Living Boldly and Consciously: How Two Entrepreneurs Are Changing the Way Consumers Make Sustainable Purchases
When the pandemic first began in the spring of 2020 and the impact of lockdown was hitting, people found lots of different ways to occupy their time. Some got into knitting, some became sourdough breadmaking aficionados, and some used the…
May 31, 2022
Blog
People Like People
I recently read a profile on Brandon Stanton, the founder of the Humans of New York. The reporter writes, “the more stories of uplift he posted, the more people craved them. His most devoted followers, he said, who showed up…
May 25, 2022
Blog
Beauty is (crepey)skin deep
The other day I was in a downward dog, and I took note of the “loose” skin on my thighs right above my knees. My wife is often talking about “crepey” skin, and I am covered with it. Up and…
May 18, 2022
Blog
How Processing Grief Can Lead to More Authentic Connections: Andrea Dorn on Writing About Loss for Children, The Power of Mindfulness and Embracing those Tough, Sad Feelings
By Patrick McKenna Andrea Dorn never expected to become an author, let alone a non-fiction children’s books. But as someone who was always creative and had a career of experience as a clinical social worker, the pieces of the puzzle…
May 11, 2022
Blog
Men Who Love Men
A couple of weeks ago, I received an email from Barry Schoenfeld from the California Community of Men. As I subsequently learned when I connected with Barry, he was doing “competitive research” when he came upon MenLiving. Curious, he signed…
May 4, 2022
Blog
The Games Men Play
I love to play games - basketball, pickleball, golf, you name it. But when it comes to friendship with men, games become more challenging to play. Typically, games have rules to follow that make the game fun, but with male…
April 27, 2022
Blog
Teaching Advocacy and Acceptance: Chris Tompkins on Talking to Your Kids, Not Making Assumptions and His Book Raising LGBTQ Allies
Author Patrick McKenna When Chris Tompkins realized there was a missing conversation happening with his own family, he felt the need to not just broaden their view on LGBTQ topics, but to do so with families everywhere. This put him…
April 19, 2022
Blog
Special Stuff….Zen Parenting Radio Episode #644
We are big fans of Zen Parenting Radio (and not because our ED is one of the cohosts!). From time to time, we highlight an episode that resonates with us. In Support Them from the Outside- Podcast #644,Todd and Cathy…
April 19, 2022
Blog
IYCTF Episode 10: Ben Feller
MenLiving presents If You've Come This Far. IYCTF is a podcast where Shaun Emerson and Chris Lozier aim simply to have authentic conversations with interesting people about what they do to make life more fulfilling and more impactful, and they…
April 13, 2022
Blog
A Shocking Revelation
Check out this study from 2014… Researchers at University of Virginia and Harvard University ran a series of 11 studies and found that participants from a range of ages generally did not enjoy spending even brief periods of time alone…
April 6, 2022
Blog
React or Respond
On Oscar night, after what’s now being referred to as “the slap”, I posted this to the Men Living page: So many thoughts … The idea that a slap to the face is the way to resolve conflict is exactly…
March 30, 2022
Blog
“Healing is a Marathon” How Christopher LeMark is Breaking Down Barriers and Normalizing Therapy, One Cup of Coffee at a Time
Christopher LeMark’s path to healing has been a difficult, involving self-examination and learning give himself the space to process and restore his mental wellness. For him, it’s been a marathon, not a sprint. While on this journey, he felt like…
March 16, 2022
BlogLiving Intentionally
The Work
I am a big fan of Byron Katie and her work, The Work. If you are familiar with her, feel free to skip to the “Katie and her work resonates with me” for the big payoff 😏. If you are…
March 2, 2022
Blog
Finding the Courage to Love Yourself and Your Identity, Fully: Dr. Stacee Reicherzer Speaks with MenLiving
Dr. Stacee Reicherzer knows exactly who she is and what makes her sparkle. But it wasn’t an easy road to get to self-discovery. Growing up queer and transgender in South Texas, she faced plenty of bullying and traumatic experiences for…
February 28, 2022
Blog
Hold My Hand
In 2106, the Dalai Lama, Archbishop Desmond Tutu and Douglas Abrams published The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World. It was a book based on Archbishop Tutu’s visit to the Dalai Lama's home in Dharamsala, India, to…
February 15, 2022
BlogLiving Intentionally
Metaverse, Shmetaverse
This picture above is of me. Rather, my Bitmoji. I hope you’ll recognize me in case we meet up in the “metaverse.” Have you been reading about the metaverse? It is a term first coined by Neal Stephenson in his…
February 2, 2022
Blog
The Unending Quest for Happiness: Why Authentic Connection May Be The Answer You’re Missing
When Ruth Whippman, author of the New York Times Editor’s Choice book “America the Anxious: How Our Pursuit of Happiness is Creating a Nation of Nervous Wrecks,” was asked why embracing negative emotions is actually a good thing, she said…
January 31, 2022
BlogLiving Intentionally
Zen Parenting: A Q&A with Cathy Cassani Adams
On February 1st, MenLiving "extended" family member, Cathy Cassani Adams (she is our ED's wife 😉) wil release her latest book, Zen Parenting. By the title, you might think this book is just about parenting (because it is in the title…
January 26, 2022
Blog
How to Relax Relationship Tension, and Get Your Life Back on Track Fast
Guest Author: Steve Srotir Does your relationship feel like a stretched rubber band that’s about to snap? Leaving you stressed, confused, and wondering... How did you get here? What do you do next? Me too… Been there done, done that.…
January 19, 2022
Blog
Getting Intimate
On Friday, Patrick McKenna and I were collaborating on a communication piece to welcome new men connecting with MenLiving for the first time. In the initial draft, Patrick included a sentence about small batches. It read, “Small Batches are more intimate…
January 12, 2022
Blog
Making Mental Health a Fitness Routine: Blake Reichenbach Talks About The Intersection of Media, Body Image and Men’s Physical and Mental Wellness.
Before Blake Reichenbach founded the publication, Self-Himprovement, he felt frustrated with the content he was being paid to create as a freelance writer. So the writer created his own website where he had the freedom to create the content he…
January 6, 2022
BlogLiving Intentionally
Numbers & Labels
I just finished reading, The Every, by Dave Eggers. The novel is basically about a monopoly tech company that dominates humanity and a woman's efforts to destroy it. In the book, the Every introduces (among many other things) two apps,…
January 5, 2022
Blog
Taking Off the Shield and Raising Boys to Be Emotionally Connected: Dr. Michael Reichert Speaks with MenLiving
Patrick McKenna Dr. Michael Reichert has made a lifelong career out of helping young boys get in touch with their emotions and unlearn harmful ideas around masculinity. He’s an author, psychologist and Executive Director of the Center for the Study…
January 4, 2022
BlogLiving Intentionally
A Radical Blog Post
Radical New Paradigm. Radical Candor. Radical Acceptance. Radical Friendship. Radical Parenting. Radical Transparency. Radical Masculinity. Radical Rest (Huh??). These noun phrases are just a small sample of what seems to be a fascination with the radical modifier these days. Are…
December 29, 2021
BlogLiving Connected
Friendships of Character
Over the last year, I have used this space to share my thoughts on relationships and friendships. Today, I am sharing with you an excerpt from an interview between David Brooks, the New York Times columnist, and ethicist, Leon Kass. In this…
December 21, 2021
Blog
The Incredible Shrinking Man (or part of the Man)
Growing up, I visited with both sets of grandparents often. Without fail, every time I would enter my Nana Emerson’s house, she would give me a big hug and exclaim, “Oh, Shaun, you are getting so big, and I am…
December 15, 2021
BlogLiving Connected
Circles of Friendship
Shaun Emerson Robin Dunbar, the evolutionary psychologist, is best known for his namesake “Dunbar’s number,” which he defines as the number of stable relationships people are able to maintain at once. (The proposed number is 150.) But in a new book…
November 24, 2021BlogMeet MenLiving
I highly recommend “If You’ve Come This Far” (especially episode 1)!
Todd Adams MenLiving has grown quite a bit in its offerings in the last few years. We began as a group of men coming to my living room once a month to have an authentic discussion and has evolved into…
November 9, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Divine Medicine
Guest Author: David Young Being human is a gift, but all too often is a painful and lonely one. Unresolved pain is trauma of spirit and flesh. Chronic suffering emboldens the lure of addictive and numbing aspects of social media, violence, greed,…
November 2, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
hot sauce on ice cream
I like hot sauce / spicy stuff, and I've historically felt constrained by just whether or not the thing is "already spicy". I've been getting joy lately by figuring out how to make my food spicy, whether it was intended…
November 2, 2021
Blog
The Other Day…
The other day, during a rather tense discussion my wife and I were having…(okay, it devolved into an argument…let me be honest here), it turned from the topic we were “discussing” to how I’m difficult to communicate with. This led me…
October 27, 2021
BlogUncategorized
Cacao
Guest Author: David Young Cacao is served worldwide, often at empathogenic and entheogenic medicine ceremonies, yoga/tantric/breathwork/meditation sessions, and many other gatherings. It is easy for anyone to enjoy themselves at home and it can strengthen relationships especially if enjoyed as a…
October 19, 2021
Blog
How To Not Be Perfect (What’s Shame Got To Do With It?)
Erik Treese & Joey Cardella Spoiler alert: This blog post is about shame. Ugh. Cool topic, bro. Bear with me though. Here I am, alone in the living room of my 1 BR apartment, having a moment where I…
October 19, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
POWER
Take a moment and think of what comes to mind when you see the word POWER. Try saying it aloud. What do you associate with the word? If you have pen and paper handy, jot down a couple words that come…
October 13, 2021
Blog
The Kingdom of the Royal Children
John Natoli Once upon a time, in an age before memory, there was a kingdom ruled by a greedy and suspicious king. His every moment was overpowered by fears of intrigue and betrayal. He held all his many possessions under…
October 12, 2021
BlogMeet MenLiving
Who are we?
I co-founded a men’s group with Frank Naugo in March of 2012. We invited a few friends into my living room to come together for a conversation. They didn’t really know what they were getting into and neither did we, but…
October 5, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Just Say it
How are you as a communicator? Do you talk about the things that are hard to talk about? This question has been front and center for me lately. My thinking on the matter has been spurred by the last two MenLiving…
September 29, 2021
Blog
Interrupting the Story: How Survivor Mark Meier Turned his Fight Against Depression into a Fight for Men’s Mental Health
After battling depression and anxiety for many years, Mark Meier almost lost his own life to suicide. The pain and mental instability he had struggled with for so long almost pushed him over the edge, but the cry from his…
September 26, 2021
Blog
Being Not Right is Uneasily Done
It’s hard to not be right. In much of our lives, it’s quite important, if not imperative to be right. If your tax accountant, dentist, plumber or air traffic controller gets it wrong, there can be severe consequences. If you show up…
September 22, 2021
Blog
Last Week in Texas
When I heard the news last week about the law that passed in Texas, I said to myself “That’s wrong and I wish that law didn’t pass.” I then went on with the rest of my day without giving it much…
September 8, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Peach Pie Party
As a student of Life and someone who’s passionate about learning how to more fully participate, engage and grow in my everyday existence, I have learned to seek out and “pool” my resources. Teacher resources that is. I lean on myself and…
August 18, 2021Blog
MenLiving Thought Leaders: An Interview with Andrew Smiler, PhD.
In his second entry to the MenLiving Thought Leader series, Patrick interviews Dr. Andrew Smiler. Dr Smiler is an author and licensed therapist with expertise in adolescent boys, men, and masculinity. He is the author of “Is Masculinity Toxic?: A…
August 16, 2021
BlogLiving Connected
Courage to Connect
On Monday, I participated in a call with MenLiving member, Tony Schmidt, and Dr. Daniel Ellenberg. Dr. Ellenberg, is a psychotherapist, marriage and relationship therapist, author, and facilitator. He has been leading men’s groups for over 30 years and is the…
August 11, 2021
Blog
Initiations
There are plenty of emotional moments in This is Us, one of the many reasons it’s my favorite show. But one scene in particular choked me up, when Randall, then a 9-year-old boy, was in his karate class with his father observing…
August 3, 2021Blog
Speak to the hurt and locate it.
My kids are going through a phase where they seem to want MOM all the time. The fact is they don’t want her all of the time, but the percentage is pretty high and I did state it “seems” like all…
July 28, 2021
Blog
Man has intuition (An original poem by John Natoli)
Man has intuition too, We carry it boiling in our belly A hot coal that won't extinguish It bubbles over in rage or suspicion Its vapor clouds our vision Sizzling whispered lies of ineptitude, inadequacy Sometimes, when we open our…
July 13, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Sweatpants
Dan Shea is a a dear friend of mine. I love him. Today, I am going to tell you a nice story about a good man doing a good thing. Maybe we all could do one good thing today, too. …
July 7, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Traffic
I drove to Detroit yesterday to meet with some customers, and while on I94 East, I ran into a bumper-to-bumper traffic jam. Teeth clenched… Grrrrr. Cue the inner dialogue: What’s going on up there? Where are all these people going in…
June 30, 2021
Blog
An Interview with Andrew Reiner
Andrew Reiner has been interested in challenging the tropes of modern day hypermasculinity since his teenage years. After becoming a father, the research he had been doing for years felt even more urgently needed. That, matched with the reception he…
June 24, 2021
BlogMeet MenLiving
Not Voted Off This Island
A neighbor and I used to get together to drink wine and discuss philosophy. (Now and then, we talked about roofing companies and battery-powered lawnmowers, too.) Brad’s an economics professor who spends much of life in a world of numbers.…
June 22, 2021
Blog
If only people would behave the way I want them to…
I recently had a conversation with a member of our Executive Team at work regarding the transition of fully remote, work from home to working back in the office. Of course, as things begin to open up here in Illinois and…
June 16, 2021
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Brothers…Sisters
For a little more than a year, I have gathered virtually with many of the men on this distribution list for meaningful connection. Some weeks, I connect with you multiple times: in big groups, small groups and one on one.…
June 9, 2021
BlogLiving Connected
Brother.
Brother is a song by LA indie rock band Lord Huron. It means a lot to me and if you know the song it might mean a lot to you as well. If this post is your first exposure to…
June 2, 2021
Blog
Part III: Finding Love & Acceptance-Living with Bipolar Disorder
I chose to share my story through this blog series for many reasons. Since 2017, nearly every person that’s come into my life on a meaningful level knows about my experiences with mental illness. Whether it's a new coworker, someone…
May 25, 2021
Blog
Part II: Finding Love & Acceptance-Living with Bipolar Disorder
Waking up in the behavioral health unit of a hospital was a surreal, humbling experience. There's often a tendency to think you’re above those who are struggling harder than you are -- it was hard to accept that I could be…
May 19, 2021Blog
Finding Love & Acceptance: Living with Bipolar Disorder
Hi, I’m Patrick. I’m about to do what I feel that I do best. I’m going to tell the story of my life and experiences living with a mood disorder. It’s an abbreviated version of the rollercoaster ride of the…
May 12, 2021
Blog
11 Mistakes
I’m 19 years into my marriage and I don’t pretend to be an expert. However, I know my foundation is solid and will endure the test of time. Mostly because when I screw up, I do my best to learn…
May 5, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Birding is a lot like personal growth work.
I’m lying in bed (in my camper) unable to sleep and all of a sudden I hear it. “Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you-all?” Who cooks for you? Who cooks for you-aaaaall?” The amazing, distinctive call of the Barred Owl. Undeniable. And, thrilling…
April 28, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Be-Do-Have
"We don't see the world as it is; we see it as we are"― Anaïs Nin. What does this quote open up your awareness to? Can you reflect on an experience that might bring it alive? Perhaps if it has some…
April 21, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
There’s this dance…
There’s this dance of BEing in the present moment AND creating your future. Oh this dance can be a graceful waltz or a rough krump battle. It can be carefully choreographed or made up on the spot and improvised. How to…
April 14, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Spiritual Bypass or Letting Go
Over the last couple of weeks, it has been suggested to me that I may be a “spiritual bypasser.” Do you know this term? From Wikipedia, “Spiritual bypass or spiritual bypassing is a "tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing…
April 7, 2021
Blog
“She did all the things”
I wrote this post today so you will see this one phrase. And if you decide to read this post, I hope this one phrase sticks to you: “She did all the things.” In yesterday’s episode of Zen Parenting Radio,…
March 24, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Questions of Leadership
My company recently administered a leadership assessment (test) for a cross section of employees. The Sales Management team (of which I’m a part) was reviewing the assessment of an individual in our organization we’ve deemed ready to be in a Leadership…
March 17, 2021
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Zoom or not to Zoom
As of yesterday, 92M Americans had been vaccinated. The new President has stated that there will be enough vaccinations for every American by the end of May. Cubs and Sox will let fans in the parks. I am getting a…
March 10, 2021
Blog
It’s Not How, It’s Where
Every day I ask men, “How are you doing?” Usually I get a response like, “fine” or “good”, but that’s not really what I’m looking for. A better way to phrase the question is, “How are you feeling?” When guys…
March 2, 2021
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Conflict
Conflict. Take a moment and ponder this word. What are your thoughts and beliefs about it? What comes up for you when see and put your attention towards it? Perhaps say it aloud. Conflict. Any body sensations? How do you feel when…
February 24, 2021
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Alone not Lonely
I like being alone. There are many activities I would prefer to do solo, but I don’t often get the chance. I am rarely alone. I think I decided long ago that engaging others would lead to a more fruitful…
February 17, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Forward!
I found my answer when I was thumbing through Walden by Thoreau the other day. I’d been working through a couple of weeks of being in some sort of a “funk”. This somber tone edging up to a low-grade depressed state. This…
February 10, 2021
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Sleeping, Working, and Leisuring
Every year, the US Bureau of Labor Statistics surveys how Americans spend their time. The latest results are from the 2019 study. The chart below depicts average hours per day spent in selected activities in total and then for men…
February 3, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
People Don’t Care About Me (Why That’s Good News)
A good chunk of my day is spent seeking out approval of others. It pains me (and is slightly embarrassing) to admit, but it’s the truth. Three examples: I do pushups and jog regularly - partially to clear my head and…
January 26, 2021
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
“I’m right, you’re wrong”
On a recent Sunday, while engaging in some early morning contemplation time, humor and laughter came to mind. I was reminded of a couple recent experiences I had related to the topic. First, I watched comedian Russell Howard interview Matthew McConaughey. In…
January 19, 2021
BlogLiving Intentionally
Performing or Living?
Last August, Pete Hamill, the New York City journalist, novelist, essayist and editor died. Over the years, I had read several of his newspaper pieces and had always intended on reading some of his longer works. News of his death…
January 5, 2021
BlogLiving ConnectedMeet MenLiving
Dancing Through COVID
https://youtu.be/Nb5nvN4iuvg The pandemic swept through the world with tragic consequences. Through the adversity and pain, emerged some normalcy, some joy. Watch MenLiving Board Member, Edward Gudas, his wife Laurie and daughters Kalina and Lainie dance and sing their way through…
December 29, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
I Love Awkward!
Every Saturday, for years, I have read Peggy Noonan’s Declarations column in the Wall Street Journal. Last Saturday, Peggy was writing as always about politics, the country and not too surprisingly COVID and the vaccine. Towards the end of the…
December 24, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
Bow…then clean your closet
Often, there’s a tape playing inside my head that says, “You’re not doing enough." This tape can continually run if I don’t stop and bring my awareness to it. Sometimes I’ll catch myself in these moments and either internally or by physically…
December 16, 2020
Blog
The GOAT and The Kiss
I grew up outside of Boston, but I have now been in the Midwest for almost 20 years longer than I was in New England. And despite my move, I have maintained my allegiance to Boston’s sports franchises. A loyalty…
December 9, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
Living Intentional
“How was your day?” “Pretty good. How was yours?” Sound familiar? It does to me. Honestly, I get tired of hearing myself reply in that way with such regularity. Now, don’t get me wrong, “pretty good” is pretty good these days. My wife is asking me about my…
December 2, 2020
BlogMeet MenLiving
Ruminating…
I have been ruminating about our organization’s new name, MenLiving. As you can see, we eliminated the space between Men and Living to create the name and logo. My contemplation led me to wonder what if we added the space…
November 25, 2020
BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving – same game, different name
Back when I established my first “men’s group” in 2008, I personally invited a handful of men to join me in forming a thing I had little knowledge about, much less a plan for. Because they trusted me (I suppose) a…
November 17, 2020
Blog
Heads You Win…?
For years, I have been receiving Fortune’s daily email, TermSheet. TermSheet provides a summary of the previous day’s venture capital and private equity deals. A few weeks ago, I read this: Numan, a UK-based online health clinic for men just raised…
November 10, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
“Don’t Know” Mind
I am creating this post on Tuesday afternoon prior to polls closing. I was going to write about men’s health, but figured it would be a little numb not to share something that is born from an election that is…
November 3, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
The Trials of a Rule Follower
I continue to learn things about myself. At 47 yrs old, I’m sometimes surprised to find there’s more here to discover. This summer my family and I went to visit my parent home in Michigan. It just so happened that they were…
October 20, 2020
BlogMeet MenLiving
Poems
The topic of our September 30th Chicago meeting was Cultivating Creativity. Mike Rosen and Todd Adams wrote a couple great poems about their MenLiving experience. We Gather- Mike Rosen Under the timeless glow of an autumn moon We gather Not…
October 14, 2020
BlogMeet MenLiving
What is a “regular” guy?
To start, this is a picture of my friend, Craig Dooley. He is a wonderful man. I texted him last night to let him know that I would be writing about him. I think he might be surprised by the…
October 7, 2020
Blog
Creatively Yours
There are at least as many ways in which parenting is wonderful as it is challenging. My kids teach me things almost daily (I’m guessing you can relate). Their wisdom catches me off guard sometimes and I’m stuck sitting there dumbfounded,…
September 29, 2020
Blog
Vulnerability, Leadership, and Masculinity
In recent days, we have witnessed a high profile microcosm of the struggle in which our men’s group and we have been engaged for nearly a decade. The arena was no less than the National Football League, the most popular…
September 22, 2020
BlogLiving Connected
The Most Important Work You Can Do Right Now.
A while back, I conducted an initial therapy session with a family: Mom, Dad and sixteen-year-old son. Let’s call him James. Mom and son sat on the couch, dad on an adjacent chair. The presenting issue was the son’s disrespect…
September 16, 2020
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
You know what assuming does…
As I was finishing up a run in the forest preserve yesterday I noticed an older woman walking with 2 plastic bags towards the woods. Wait, is that my neighbor from across the street? She was a ways away from me but…
September 8, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
Am I going to start crying?
Last night I was sitting alone on my back deck on a beautiful summer night and was a little beat down from a long week. I listened to some soft music (Natalie Merchant) and just sat there. I began thinking…
September 1, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
Just Sitting
I am 57 years old. Let’s say for the simplicity of round numbers, adulthood starts at 17. Therefore, I have been an “adult” for 40 years (damn!). For the first 30 of those adult years, I was a workaholic, mostly…
August 26, 2020
Blog
Beauty or Utility?
After I’m done with the workday, I generally go out for a stroll through the neighborhood to unwind, get some fresh air and move my bones. One of the things I enjoy doing on these walks is to check out…
August 18, 2020
BlogLiving Connected
Honest Human Relationships
About 3 or 4 years ago, I attended my first MenLiving meeting. Today, I am MenLiving’s Board President and a very involved day to day volunteer. But, honestly, I’m still not particularly comfortable with the concepts of traditional “men’s work,”…
August 12, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
Everything is Possible
I’m lying in bed at 4 o’clock am thinking of how things could have gone better in our Sales and Customer Service Coordination meeting today - that’s never a good thing…OR, could it be? I’m reminded of what this meeting is…
August 4, 2020
Blog
Cry, of course!
This past Saturday, to open up our Board of Directors' meeting for MenLiving, we checked-in with naming a man or men that inspire us or is part of the “why” we do this work. It happened to be a rather impromptu…
July 29, 2020
BlogLiving Connected
Artistry and Play
Do you consider yourself an artist? What is the first type of art that you hold yourself up against when trying to answer that question? Or, did you immediately answer “no”? If I weren’t asking the questions here, I would have probably answered…
July 22, 2020
BlogLiving ConnectedLiving Intentionally
Dog Paddling
Last week, I was hanging by the pool with my wife and 26 year old daughter when my daughter suggested we have a doggy paddle “competition.” I was reading a book at the time so wasn’t particularly interested. They weren’t…
July 15, 2020
BlogLiving Intentionally
The Qualities of a Gentleman
I wanted to share a blog post I wrote over 9 years ago. The point was and is not political. The point was and is aspirational. On February 15th, President Obama honored 15 individuals at the annual Presidential Medal of…
July 1, 2020
Blog
Carrying Within
Recently, spurred on by what’s been happening in this country since George Floyd’s death, we’ve been immersed in several discussions centered around systemic racism in this country and what impact that has on black and brown skinned people and all…
June 23, 2020
BlogMeet MenLiving
Finding Harmony
Breathe in… To live in a more harmonious world by deepening connections amongst men Breathe out… These prompts are reminders for me, as much if not more than, they are for anyone reading this. Between breaths is our vision for…
June 10, 2020
Blog
A Tragic Death and the Memory of a Missed Opportunity
By now you’ve hopefully heard the story of how George Floyd’s life ended. I am deeply saddened, angered and disappointed to learn of yet another black man’s life ending prematurely and in such a brutal and senseless way. He was murdered by…
June 2, 2020
Blog
Life is Unfair
I had a rather unusual Friday night. It was unusual because I was home all by myself. I had worked from home and my wife had taken the kids to an early evening "play date" after picking my oldest up…
February 25, 2020
BlogMeet MenLiving
Meet MenLiving: MenLiving Co-Founders Todd Adams and Frank Naugo
Meet the Tribe is an ongoing blog post providing more insight into the men who are members of our community. In our inaugural post, we introduce you to Shaun Emerson
December 19, 2019
BlogLiving Intentionally
Disprove Your Story…by golly
One of the great things for me about exercise, especially the kind that is somewhat monotonous, or rather, "trance-like" (as is the case with running) is how it allows my mind to move in ways it otherwise wouldn't. Both biking and running…
November 18, 2019
BlogMeet MenLiving
How MenLiving Changed My Life
Fast forward to today, and here we are. I’m sober, and I wish I could go back to talk to the 34-year-old version of me. Among the many things I’d say is that this group can change you. I’m blessed…
November 6, 2019
BlogMeet MenLiving
Meet MenLiving: Shaun Emerson
Meet the Tribe is an ongoing blog post providing more insight into the men who are members of our community. In our inaugural post, we introduce you to Shaun Emerson
November 5, 2019
BlogLiving Intentionally
Am I enough in this life?
Am I enough in this life? Musings and contemplations to help me better understand myself and how I'm spending my time to make the best of this precious life.
October 16, 2019
BlogLiving Intentionally
A Glimpse of Understanding
I am visiting my brother who lives in Snoqualmie, WA which is about 30 minutes east of Seattle. After dropping off my 16-year-old daughter off for a lunch date, I had about an hour to kill so I decided to…
August 5, 2019
BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving 2.0 Update
MenLiving men’s group is excited to announce its new status as a not for profit organization! The current group began February 2012 in Todd’s living room with a few others longing for authentic conversation and connection amongst men. Since that…
April 24, 2019
BlogMeet MenLiving
MenLiving Announces Not-For-Profit Status
MenLiving men’s group is excited to announce its new status as a not-for-profit organization! The current group began February 2012 in Todd’s living room with a few others longing for authentic conversation and connection amongst men. Since that 1st meeting…
April 12, 2019
Blog
Response to the Gillette Commercial
There’s a been quite a bit of on-line dialogue in the last 24 hours regarding the new Gillette commercial “We Believe: The Best Men Can Be” If you haven’t seen it, please take a look here. It’s been viewed over…
January 15, 2019
Blog
Don’t Give Your Wife A Break
Yesterday a friend of mine was looking for support regarding an argument he recently had with his wife. The story he shared was similar to experiences I’ve had with my wife. “I worked in the backyard and cleaned out the…
September 6, 2018
Blog
White Male Privilege & Toxic Masculinity
“White male privilege” and “toxic masculinity” seems to be brought up now more than ever. Many men I know take offense to these terms. I don’t because I believe it’s true now and has been true for a very long…
July 1, 2018
Blog
Wanted: White Men…
…to step into the mature masculine. I define this as the capacity to be both strong and gentle, competitive and compassionate and the wisdom to know which energy to call on at any particular moment. Some men have recently criticized…
October 12, 2017
Blog
Calling All Complacent White Straight Males
I am complacent when it comes to the tragedies that fill up my newsfeed - Charlottesville and North Korea, just to name a few. When I hear bad news, I pause for a moment and think to myself, “I’m scared”…
August 17, 2017
Blog
Straight men showing PDA?
In this video, straight Dutch men are holding hands in public in response to the gay couple who were physically attacked for a public display of affection.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ezPXzGtXhVc I find this powerful and moving, and I would love to see…
April 10, 2017
Blog
Parental Amnesia
The following is a short list off the top of my head of some personal bad decision making from my adolescence. @ 5 years old I played “doctor” with a girl neighbor across the street engaging in a session of…
October 21, 2016
Blog
Don’t Be A Dick
I struggle with the writing process. My mind works in the form of bullet points as opposed to long-form which is what prohibits me from saying what I want to say. But I feel I have ideas of value to…
October 19, 2016
Blog
What is “Men’s Work?”
I have been doing a weekly podcast with my wife Cathy called Zen Parenting Radio for the last 6 years. The podcast is not so much about parenting, instead it’s mostly about self-awareness. Typically it’s simply the two of us…
September 9, 2016Blog
11 Mistakes Your Marriage Needs You to Stop Making
I’m 11 years into my marriage and I don’t pretend to be an expert. However, I know my foundation is solid and will endure the test of time. Mostly because when I screw up, I do my best to learn…
August 17, 2016
Blog
Am I a Bad Dad? Am I a Bad Husband?
I have been in an on-line debate with a few close friends of mine regarding whether or not men have the nurturing gene the way women do. I argue that I while I have the ability to do everything (less…
August 17, 2016
BlogLiving Intentionally
Silence Is Not Golden
I am a white straight male. I can wear a hoodie when I walk down the street. I feel safe because I live in an upper-middle class neighborhood. I don’t get judged because of my skin color. I don’t have…
July 22, 2016
Blog
What Is Wrong And Right With This Video
I posted a 53 second video yesterday morning on my Facebook page. It is of a little boy (maybe 3 years old) stroking, protecting, and caressing his newborn brother. That’s it. Big deal, right? Well the video has been viewed…
January 5, 2016
Blog
Cubs- All The Way?
Let’s get one thing straight- I am a White Sox fan. But on the eve of this Wildcard playoff game between the Cubs and the Pirates, I am 100% rooting for the North-siders. I have never subscribed to the idea…
October 7, 2015